Thursday, July 15, 2010

my bum and the dump

I realize the title to this post may lead one to believe I might be talking about something "else". But I'm not. I am talking about MY bum and THE dump. It's not really my bum either that I'm talking about but it's close. A couple of days ago I stepped out of the shower to grab something and on my way back in I slipped and fell. Half in the shower and half out. Which means I landed on the curb, which is sharp. I cracked my head on the door and saw stars for a sec but when my senses came back I realized that my right saddle bag was definitely injured. Today it has a furious bruise on it that I would love to show you but my contract states that I can't show my butt on my blog. Since there is no butt double on call today you will have to use your imagination.

It is the size of a huge mango (the bruise, not my bum) and it is a scary mixture of red, blue and purple. It hurts to sleep or sit on that side so now my neck is sore from sleeping in one position all night.

I don't bruise easily so I am very proud of it. Well done me.

Today I went to the dump for the first time ever. It was gross. The man keeps saying to me "what did you expect?"

Well..... I didn't expect anything. I wasn't planning a dump run today so I hadn't thought about it. The princess in me doesn't spend a lot of time pondering the dump and the princess in me refuses to go back.

The birds were what really threw me for a loop. Nasty seagulls. As the man emptied the back of his truck into the filth and foulness I did this....

and this.....

and this....

I'm very helpful, I know. Those nasty seagulls. It was like a scary movie only at the end of it my eyes weren't pecked out. But they did poop in three different places on his truck, that's sort of scary. The dump smells really bad. Really, REALLY bad. I didn't care for it. Such a princess....

We started laying hardwood today. I actually liked it. Which is more than I can say for the stone we made an attempt to put on the fireplaces. That is a thankless, horrific job. 8 hours in and I said to the man. "I'm done. I'm ready to call a stone mason."

2 minutes later he was on the phone. He is resurrecting chivalry all over the place. He also hired a tiler. I love him.

Back to the hardwood...... I bled today.

I have left my imprint on Willacy. We are forever bound together by blood. Or until we sand the hardwood.

Willacy. Such a fair weathered friend......


  1. oh man this whole post was hilarious :) The mango bum comment made me laugh out loud hahahahaha. The dump..... I've never been either cause it just sounds so NASTY to me.

  2. I feel like everyone is trying to kill you. First Willacy and now your shower!

  3. I hope we all have something in our contracts that prevents us from baring our bums on our blogs. I have some bum bruises from this week, too, though clearly not as spectacular as yours and I think I got mine having more fun (water skiing) than you did.

    Love. Your. Blog.

  4. hey there, your dump shots are very nice.
    bum bruises hurt.