Thursday, June 3, 2010

potty talk

Today I had an epiphany while using the only semi working toilet at the little brown house. Before I explain my epiphany I should show you what I endure while I work there.

This is the toilet I get to use 10 times a day. Despite the fact that I am a lady, I pee a lot:

This lovely toilet doesn't flush so here is the bucket we fill to pour away the you-know-what:

And this is the super handy tap we use to fill the bucket:

And this is the little tiny white pushy thingie that turns the water on to fill the bucket:

And here is my epiphany:

It doesn't bother me to use this toilet. Every time I go in there I say to myself "wow, this room really smells bad. I can't wait until it is new and pretty". And then I get up, fill the bucket, pour the bucket into the toilet, use some had sanitizer and walk away.

After the 8th time using this disgusting bathroom today I recalled one of the funniest things my mum has ever said to me.
Once I belched in her presence and she said this exact thing to me (and to whoever was standing there with us.) "My only regret in life is that my daughters are not more refined". She'll deny saying that, I'm sure, but it is the ABSOLUTE truth. She said it, I swear!

Then I remembered another funny thing she did when we were kids. She dragged all of us to K-Mart. She was looking for something and when she couldn't find it she went to ask someone. While she was talking to him she burped. Very lady-like, but it was a burp, nonetheless. She can deny that all she wants but there are witnesses so it would be fruitless for her to try.

So again, genetics. I am classy because my mum is classy. It's really very simple. And it's this refined classiness that allows me to sit here.....

.............10 times a day.

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